How Our Words Can Hurt or Bring Healing
Reading time: 9 minutes
*The teachings of this article were written with the help of AI.
I attended a Bulgarian Cup football match in my hometown of Kazanlak, watching the local team, Rozova Dolina, face the national champions, Ludogorets Razgrad. A strange situation at the stadium made me think about the power of our words.
A Special Match for Rozova Dolina
The local football club, Rozova Dolina Kazanlak, usually competes in Bulgaria’s third league. As a child, I trained with this team, so it is always exciting to watch their matches. However, the Bulgarian Cup is special because it includes teams from all leagues. Today, Rozova Dolina plays against Ludogorets Razgrad, the Bulgarian first-league champions and former Champions League competitors who have played against Real Madrid and other major clubs.
I head to the stadium with a friend. Normally, matches here attract only about 100 spectators, but today, the turnout is incredible—around 3,000 people. The stadium is buzzing with energy, and for the first time, it feels like a stadium in a major city.
Ludogorets’ Bus
Just Before the Match Begins
The Match Begins
The match starts, and Rozova Dolina surprises everyone by holding their ground. Most of the action takes place in the center of the field. While Ludogorets may not be playing at full intensity, some of their key players are on the pitch.
A View of the Match From Where I am Standing
Unfortunately, not everything is pleasant. A man in the crowd yells offensive comments at the referees and players. It is clear that he is using the match to express his anger and frustrations from life. I feel sorry for him, but I try to focus on the game instead, as God teaches us not to be overcome by such negativity.
A Close Representation of the Guy Who Yelled Offensive Words To the Players and the Referees – image AI
The Power of Our Words: Swords or Healing?
Then I remember a verse from the Bible:
“The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” – Proverbs 12:18
Every day, we use words when we speak to our family, friends, coworkers, or strangers. Some words bring peace and encouragement, while others can cause pain that may remain in a person’s heart for a lifetime.
Proverbs 12:18 compares reckless words to swords because they can cut deeply. Wise words, spoken with love, however, bring healing. This verse reminds us that what we say matters. Our words can either hurt people or help them.
Why Do People Insult Others?
People insult others for many different reasons. Sometimes a person is angry and speaks without thinking. Anger can make someone say things that they later regret. Because they cannot control their emotions, they allow their emotions to control their tongue.
Most of the time, people insult others because they feel insecure. When someone feels weak, ill, or unhappy, he may try to make another person feel small, just as he feels inside. By putting someone else down, he is not alone in his suffering and may even feel stronger temporarily.
A Person Expressing His Negativity – Pexels.com
Pride is another reason. A proud person may believe that he is better, smarter, more handsome and more important than others. He may speak harshly because he does not respect the feelings of the person in front of him, considering others to be of much lower value than himself.
An Arrogant Person – Pexels.com
Some people also learn this behavior from their surroundings. If a person grows up hearing constant insults, shouting, and criticism, he may begin to believe that this is a normal way to communicate.
But the Bible does not tell us that we have to continue this pattern. We can choose a different way.
An insult may take only a few seconds to say, but its effect can last much longer. A person may forget many things that happen during the day, but he may remember hurtful words for years.
This is why Proverbs compares reckless words to swords. Words do not leave physical wounds, but they can create deep wounds in the heart.
Our minds remember bad things in order to stay alert and protect us when something similar happens again. Bad words and wrong actions from others can remain in our hearts for a lifetime.
God promises those who believe in Him and do His will that all the burdens we carry throughout our lives will be removed in everlasting life. We will not forget them, but they will no longer bring us suffering as they do here on Earth.
How Should We Respond When People Insult Us?
When someone insults us, our first reaction may be to answer with another insult. We may feel that we need to defend ourselves or show the other person that we are not weak. We may feel that we must frighten the person with even more of his own evil so that he will stop hurting us.
But responding with the same kind of words only makes the situation worse.
The Bible teaches us to control our response. A calm answer can stop an argument from becoming a larger conflict. We do not have to answer every insult. If we do not know what to say, silence may be the wiser response.
A Calm Answer
Of course, this does not mean that we should allow people to treat us badly. We must clearly establish boundaries. We can tell someone that his behavior is unacceptable and walk away without insulting him in return.
Let us take Jesus as our example. He does not respond to evil with evil. He remains truthful, patient, and faithful to God.
When someone insults us, we can also pray before we answer. Even a short prayer such as, “Lord, help me control my words,” can change our response. We can also pray, “Lord, please do not let evil take over me.”
We can remember that the other person may be struggling with anger, pride, fear, or pain. He may feel very low inside. Understanding this does not make the insult right, but it helps us avoid becoming angry in return. Instead, we can feel sorry for this person, knowing what kind of heavy burden of anger, envy, and sadness he carries.
Choosing Words That Bring Healing
Proverbs 12:18 does not only warn us about bad words. It also gives us a beautiful alternative: “the tongue of the wise brings healing.”
God wants our words to become a source of healing.
We bring healing when we encourage someone who feels discouraged. We bring healing when we forgive instead of constantly reminding someone of his mistakes. We bring healing when we speak honestly but with kindness.
A Kind Girl
Being wise with our words does not mean that we never correct anyone. Sometimes love requires us to say something difficult. But even when we correct someone, we can speak with respect.
There is a simple piece of wisdom that can help us before we speak. We can first ask ourselves three questions:
- Is it true?
- Is it necessary?
- Is it kind?
These questions can protect us from speaking recklessly.
We especially need to pay attention to our words when we are angry. That is when our tongue becomes dangerous. Words spoken in anger can destroy relationships that have taken years to build.
In such moments, we must remember the wisdom of Scripture and choose words that bring healing instead of words that cause more pain.
Every day, we have a choice. We can use our words like swords, or we can use them to bring healing.
Our Words Reveal Our Hearts
Our words are more powerful than we sometimes realize. They reveal what is happening inside us.
Bad things in life can happen to anybody. I admit that, during some periods of my life, I am just like the person from the football match—unhappy, constantly criticizing, and trying to bring others down in order to feel stronger. That happens when I do not follow the Bible.
Even now, sometimes when I am feeling sick, when someone has insulted or mistreated me, or when someone has lied to me or stolen money from me, bad words start building up in my heart to a great extent. That is when I pray for God’s mercy and ask Him not to let evil overcome me. Little by little, I manage to calm my spirit and try not to take revenge.
Bad things surely happen to us. Someone may slap us before we have even raised our heads. Someone may trip us even before we have taken the first step. That is when we must remain calm and trust in God. We must NOT let evil kill the good in us.
I have noticed that when I manage to remain calm and simply walk away, the torment ends. We cannot make evil people good, but we can walk away from them. Then I just have to find someone good-hearted to lift my spirit again.
Let our speech become more than ordinary conversation. Let it become an opportunity to reflect God’s love to the people around us.
Drama Until the Final Whistle
The match remains balanced until Rozova Dolina receives a red card, leaving them a player down. Despite this, they continue to fight hard. Ludogorets eventually scores, making it 2–0, with their second goal coming in the final moments. The tension lasts until the very end.
The situation in the match reminded me how bad some people had felt from the inside and how easily they had projected their bad temper onto us. It was important to run away from aggressive people; otherwise, we could become like them. I learned to let God protect us and never let evil overcome the people who believe in and follow Him.